I was diagnosed with a disease called left varicocele.
Simply put, it is a disease that, as it worsens, makes it impossible for the body to produce children.
Fortunately, the doctor said, “It’s not serious, so we’ll just have to wait and see. Take the medicine and if the pain gets worse, come back to the hospital.
I had been feeling discomfort in my left ball for a while now, and although I’m sure it’s nothing, it would be terrible if it was cancer or something, and I was stressed out worrying about it every day, so I went to the hospital to get some relief, and I was surprised to find out that I had been diagnosed with a disease.
Well, I was depressed.
It’s not a life-threatening disease, and apparently it can be cured with surgery, so I’m thankful for now.
But I’m scared of surgery.
I don’t want to have my body cut and pasted.
At any rate, I got a month’s supply of medicine, so I’m going to go back to the hospital in another month to see if my symptoms are getting better or worse.
Well, I’m glad they found it while the symptoms were mild.
I woke up unexpectedly at 5:00 a.m., had a painful or not painful sensation in my left ball, then went back to sleep, and next thing I knew, I woke up around 9:40 a.m.
I was late because my office starts at 9:30.
This made me feel really depressed that my life was being dictated by this left ball thing, and then I went to the hospital and found out I had a disease.
I don’t know, it was like my body mobilized all kinds of things and dragged me to the hospital.
The human body is amazing. It’s amazing.
I guess the human body is doing a lot of things that I am not aware of.
And if I take some medicine or something and I’m cured after that, I should thank my body for finding the disease so quickly.
Well, mentally I’m much better now.
One of my life lessons is that when you are down, you should be down as much as possible.
Once your mentality hits bottom, it will only come back up.
If the speed of mental fall is slow, the speed of rise will also be slow.
Conversely, I think that the faster the speed of mental decline is, the faster the speed of mental rise will be.
So after I was diagnosed with the disease, all kinds of negative thoughts were floating around in my head, such as the cost of the surgery, the pain, the fear, and the fact that I would not be able to have children, but I didn’t shake them off at all, I just accepted the reality.
But in the process, I came to think that, well, it’s a good thing there is life, and I’m mentally much better now.
My mood is much better now because I have been feeling depressed for a while.
But now I think that I don’t have to take it too seriously at the end of the day, because it’s not like I have cancer or an incurable disease for which there is no cure, and there is a proper treatment.
Besides, there is a possibility that the symptoms will get better.
Ah, health is really a very confusing thing.
I take care of my health ten times more than anyone else, and yet I get sick like this.
I go to bed by 0:00 am and get up at 7:30 am every day, drink a healthy drink every morning, eat 3 balanced meals a day without fail, walk for 30 minutes every day, recently started going to the gym and taking a garlic supplement every morning…etc.
Like this, I take extremely good care of my health, but I got sick.
Of course I don’t smoke, and I only drink a little alcohol once a week.
But I’m doing everything I can to stay healthy, and in a way, I can give up if I get sick because of this, haha.
Also, I feel that the outline of what is important in my life has become clearer after I was diagnosed with this illness.
When you get sick, you start to think more seriously about the meaning and purpose of your life.
As a result, it becomes easier to realize what is truly important in one’s life.
“Desires” such as I want this and I want that, and “Needs” such as what is truly necessary and important to you in life are completely different things.
What I mean is, for example, the following.
A CEO who was working hard without regard for his family in order to grow his company, was diagnosed with cancer one day and when he was in bed in the hospital for treatment, he saw his family coming to visit him every day and realized that “what was really important to me was not growing my company or making a lot of money, but being with my family.”
I think that when we are ill or facing difficulties, the outlines of our “Needs” tend to emerge in this way.
Being in the midst of illness is painful, but it can also be described as a tough test to improve one’s life afterwards.
So I don’t think we should be too pessimistic about getting sick.
Of course, it depends on the severity of the illness, but I still think that if you can find what is really important in your life, even for a moment, then that is a very good life.
I don’t think illness is an absolute evil, but a trial to improve your life.
It’s tough. Of course.
Well, for now, I’m not going to think too seriously about my illness, and I’m going to do what I can by taking my medicine or going to the gym.
If I have to have a surgery, I will.
At that time, I have no choice but to be prepared.
I’m alive, so I’ll live each day as best I can.